TAKE THE TEST AND FACE THE TRUTH!
by Loui Tucker
Editor's Note: This had been floating around the Internet for a few weeks
and I didn't want to lose it. Since then, someone told me that it could be
found at http://www.louitucker.com/dance/FolkDanceAddictionQuiz.htm
Is dancing taking over our life? Have you heard whispers that you're
becoming addicted to dance? Are you afraid that you or a loved one is
becoming a dance-aholic? Take this simple test, or take it on behalf of
someone you care about. However painful it might be, it's time you faced
Count 1 point for every YES answer.
- You listen to dance music at times when you cannot possibly dance --
i.e. on your car stereo, with headphones while taking public
transportation, on airplanes. Give yourself an additional point if
you have actually taken your hands off the steering wheel while
driving in order to clap your hands at the spot in the music where
you would clap if you were dancing.
- More than 50% of the t-shirts in your wardrobe are dance-related.
Give yourself an extra point if any of them are no longer the right
size or are too worn to wear, but you keep them anyway for sentimental
reasons because they remind you of a special dance event.
- When you are debating whether or not to buy a new article of clothing,
a chief factor in the decision is whether or not you can wear it
- You go to non-dance social functions with other dancers but you
cannot carry on a conversation for longer than 15 minutes without
talking about dance. (This includes gossiping about people at dance
- You have to explain at least once a week that you missed some
over-hyped television program, a business function or social event
because it conflicted with dance class.
- What you eat for dinner depends on whether you're going dancing
afterwards (nothing too heavy, no garlic or onions).
- Even though you are an advanced dancer, you drop in on the beginners
classes at least once a month just in case they are doing a beginner
dance you've never learned.
- At least once a month you phone or e-mail another dancer to find out
whether he/she is going to a dance class. Give yourself another point
if, when you find out he/she is not going dancing, you go anyway.
- You subscribe to more than one dance-related magazine or newsletter
-- The Grapevine, Rokdim, Nirkoda, Let's Dance, New Zealand Folk
- At least two gifts per year (received or given) are dance-related --
clothing, music, video, money for dance camp, etc.
- The photos on your desk at work include at least one of you at a
- You plan business trips and vacations so as to avoid missing your
favorite local dance classes, i.e. leaving the morning after the class
and/or arriving the afternoon before the class.
- You get information about dancing in the area of your vacation or
business trip, and pack dance clothing so you can dance while you're
there. Two extra points if you pack extra dance gear on business
trips just in case your returning afternoon flight is delayed and
you have to drive from the airport directly to class instead of going
home to change clothes.
- Your car is adorned with (1 point for each)
- Dance-related personalized license plate
- Dance-related bumpersticker
- Dance-related license plate holder
- You have, at least once in the past year, spent more time driving to
a dance event than you knew you would actually spend dancing, i.e.
one hour each way commuting to dance less than two hours.
- You use your computer for dance-related activities. (1 point for each)
- You netsurf for dance-related websites.
- You have e-mail relationships with other dancers in which
you write about dance-related activities
- You check "alt.rec.folkdance" for news of dance events
- You subscribe to a mailing list organized around
- You maintain a dance-related website.
- Your e-mail address, password, or screen-saver is
- If you have pets, at least one of them has a dance-related name -- a
cat named Debki, a dog named Zwiefacher, a bird named Polka.
- You don't know the last name of at least five dancers, but refer to
them descriptively instead as something like "David Who Usually
Dances with Shoshana" or "Rachel The Tall Blond Who Wears Leggings
and Long T-shirts."
- 15 or more. Mayday, mayday. Houston, we have a serious dance problem.
Don't be surprised if your friends organize an intervention to confront you
with your addiction. You can deal with problem directly by checking your
phone book for the local 12-step-hop program in your area.
- 11-14. You're a borderline dance-aholic. With some effort on your part you
can take back control of your life without outside help. It may be enough
to cut out dancing between dance classes.
- 6-10. Not to worry. You're one of those social dancers. You can take it or
leave it. You can walk off the dance floor anytime. Dance-aholics view you
- 1-5. Are you kidding? Are you taking this test as a joke? You probably
don't know a step-hop from a pivot. Get outta here -- you wouldn't even
watch dance-related television programs!